No-one enjoys feeling conflicted about something in their life. Being stuck in this state can be a confusing, frustrating, and draining experience. It can also become a major distraction over time, as you go back and forth in an attempt to gain clarity.
Fortunately, there are things you can do to begin bringing some much-needed clarity. The following steps will help you resolve the conflict you're facing, so you feel energized and equipped to move forward with confidence.
Check your assumptions.
Sometimes, it's our own assumptions and preconceptions, rather than the actual situation we're facing, that cause us to feel conflicted. For instance, are you operating from an either-or paradigm, convinced you must choose between two options, when this is not actually the case? Although some situations genuinely do require that you choose between one option or another, there are times in life when you really can eat your cake and have it too!
If you're assuming that you need to operate within certain parameters, re-evaluate those assumptions. By discarding assumptions that are incorrect or outdated, you increase your range of options and give yourself increased room to act.
Clarify your values.
Getting in touch with your core values can bring enormous clarity when you're feeling conflicted. Your values serve as a powerful navigation tool for you to draw on. Note that as you grow and evolve over time, your values may change, so take time to assess what your values are based on who you are today.
Clarify your priorities.
What if you've assessed your values, and it's your values that are pulling you in two directions? If that's the case, it's time to prioritize. Many things may be important to you, but what is most important? As you identify your priorities, it becomes easier to make difficult decisions. The act of prioritizing creates room to acknowledge that while something matters to you, there may be something else that matters more.
Sharpen your focus by keeping the big picture in mind.
It's easy to feel conflicted when you're facing an urgent or high-pressure situation; or when someone else is making demands that you feel compelled to meet. As you get sucked into the emotional intensity of the moment, you might find yourself becoming confused and overwhelmed.
During these times, sharpen your focus by looking at the big picture. Consider how your choices will impact other areas of your life and your overall direction. When you focus on the big picture in terms of where you're headed in life, it's easier to make choices that may involve short-term pain or trade-offs.
Distinguish between feeling challenged vs. feeling disturbed.
Everyone's life is a mix of ups and downs. We all face times when there simply isn't an easy way around a situation; there's bound to be some fallout no matter what action you take. As you go through these times, tune in to your inner being and recognize the difference between feeling challenged vs. feeling disturbed.
Doing what you know is best can be challenging for several reasons: the work that will be involved, a loss that will be incurred, the need to deal with someone's hurt feelings, etc. However, it will be accompanied by a sense of peace and resolve.
On the other hand, if you're headed down a path that involves compromising your own self-respect or violating your conscience, you will likely feel extremely unsettled and disturbed afterwards. Your inner being alerting you that something is not right. This is the equivalent of an internal warning system being activated, and it's worth paying attention to it.
Image by Annette Meyer from Pixabay
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